March 12, 2009
Citing scripture's command to "speak plainer," the viceregent has imposed a strict ban on mumbling. "It also makes it hard to tell whether they are heretics plotting the destruction of all that is holy," he added.
However, he has also forbidden other students to laugh at the Tolkienoids, because, as MORAMBAR says: "No one laughs at Tolkien!"
Smoking is already encouraged, so there is no change there. The viceregent reiterated that, while pipe-smoking is cool, it is not the only smoking in which tolkien engaged or which FATS encourages. "MORAMBAR made it very clear that olifant cigars are the preferred smoking apparatus," he observed.
Tolkienoids are also being required to renew their loyalty oaths to MORAMBAR and to the aministration.
